28 February 2011

Adoption Is Not

“Adoption is not a breaking of trust but a keeping of faith… not the abandonment of a baby but an abandonment of self for a baby’s sake.” -Curtis Young

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A Transracial Family

I found an article on Adoptive Parenting that I really like and want to share:
"Becoming a transracial family is becoming a 'highly visible' family. While in some areas and in some places and situations your family may blend in to some degree, chances are that no matter where you live, as a transracial adoptive family, your family is going to get some extra attention when you are out and about.
"A lot of the attention my family gets is positive. A lot of people stop to tell us that our kids are beautiful or something like that. However we also get our fair share of questions (some just out of curiosity, some really prying, some down-right rude) and every once and awhile we get a really rude comment.
"How I respond depends a lot on where I am, what my mood is and most importantly, who is listening. My advise for handling rude/prying questions and comments when your kids are around and old enough to understand is to always say what you want your kids to hear. Kids hear everything, even when you think they aren't listening (or they want you to think they aren't listening), and as much as I would like to shoot back a witty comment or a rude reply to some of the things people say to me, I most often bite my tongue because I know my kids are paying attention.


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I named this hair style my-silly-self. She was wearing a ladybug dress to church so I went with the theme. Its' just the middle two piggytails of a crown with ballies on them. I''ll branch out into more different hair styles soon, I promise! Though it's simple I had to share 'cause there's not too much you can do with a baby's hair who sleeps on her back, and also because I thought it looked so cute with the ladybug dress. Having a girl is so much fun! If you look at the parts in the last picture you will see that the section of hair on your right is larger than the section of hair on your left. That's because I do not put the parts in the same place for two hair styles in a row. Even if it means the part is not in the middle of her hair still put the parts in different places every time just so the hair isn't always getting pulled in one direction. These curls were treated with coconut oil the day before and a bit of sprayed in water and patted in conditioner to calm the frizzies.

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27 February 2011

I Am A Black Mother

A couple nights ago my husband and I went to a transracial adoption seminar. I took many things from that meeting. One is the fact that I am a black mother. Adopting a black child does not mean that I am now included in the "black" race. It means that I am the mother of a black child and am therefore responsible for raising the child as if I were black. This does not mean I should not raise her any differently than I would my white son. It means I have to add to my repertoire of mothering skills knowledge of things that a black child needs to grow up in a healthy way. If you watched the video of the speech given by Dr. Benjamin Carson in the previous post and in the side bar of this blog, you have more of an idea of what I mean. I have the responsibility of helping her feel comfortable with her race which may be harder for her since she is growing up in a white family and neighborhood. One major way I should do this is by teaching her about how her race contributed to the building of her country, America. I should teach her about all the black Americans not mentioned in our school's history books who played huge parts making our great country what it is today. Dr. Carson's words opened my eyes to this reality. He mentions Jan Matzeliger who invented the automatic shoe lasting machine which revolutionized the shoe industry throughout the world, Charles Brooks who invented the street sweeper, Frederick Jones who invented the refrigeration system for trucks which was later adapted for airplanes, boats, and trains. He mentions Garret Morgan who invented the traffic signal and the gas mask, Henrietta Blackberry who invented the under-water cannon which made it possible to launch torpedoes from submarines, Madame CJ Walker who invented cosmetic products for women of darker complexion and was the first female of any nationality in the nation to become a millionairess on her own efforts. He mentions Charles Drew who made contributions to blood banking and the understanding of the function of blood plasma, Daniel Hale Williams who was the first successful open heart surgeon in the world, Louis Lattimer who was Thomas Edison's right-hand man and invented the filament that made the lightbulb work for more than two or three days, who invented the electric lamp, who did pioneer work in incandescent and fluorescent lighting, and who diagramed the telephone for Alexander Graham Bell. He mentions Andrew Beard who invented the automatic railroad car couplers which spurred on the Industrial Revolution, and Elijah McCoy who invented the automatic lubricator system for locomotive engines and had so many great inventions that when something new came out people would say "Is that a McCoy?" "Is that the real McCoy?" That's where the term "the real McCoy" came from. These people and other black inventors are not mentioned in our history books. I sure don't remember learning about them. The only black history figures I remember hearing about are the ones that have to do with slavery or civil rights, like Harriet Tubman, Dr. Martin Luther King Jr., or Rosa Parks. Teaching my child about all the other important black figures in history is part of what being a "black mother" means. I have the responsibility of teaching her what a black child growing up in America deserves and needs to know.

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26 February 2011

I Have Decided/Under Construction

After much thought I have decided to make this blog a transracial family blog. I have seen numerous black hair care blogs, but none specifically about having a transracial family. I think I will go there. So, this blog will be under construction in the next day or two. I may even change the blog name. No worries. If you are indeed out there, interested parties, know I will keep this blog url open with a link to the new blog url. We shall see what shall commence.

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I Am Thinking

I am thinking. I am thinking about all the things I've learned about having a transracial family that I want to share. I am thinking of turning this into a transracial family blog instead of just a hair blog. I would keep the hair stuff, but add more to it. I am thinking. This is why:
http://www.achievement.org/autodoc/podcasts/artpod-2-carson2007-vid. Things like this I want to share.

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24 February 2011

Baby Crown With Bangs

Okay, okay, so it's basically the same hair style as the last one posted, yes, but I had to share 'cause I love it with bangs even more. Sooo cute! It's done the same way, of course, just used a hair comb to keep the bangs out of the way. It think I'm gonna switch to section clips instead of hair combs. They'll probably hold better. I haven't put any hair pretties like ballies or barrettes in her hair yet because the ones I bought were just too big for her little bitty baby head. I'm gonna get some smaller ones and then you'll see some fancy lookin' hair! Also in these pictures you can see what I'm talking about on the "Our Hair Care Routine" page under "Conditioning". This is how her hair curls if I do not wash any conditioner out and let it dry naturally. It's still just barely wet in these pictures. The conditioner is not only a moisturizer, but also acts as a protectant. Beautiful!

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Snapaholics Sale

If, like me, you live in a place where it's hard to get black girl hair pretties then you should shop at snapaholics.com, and right now they're having a 20% off sale! The sale is now through March 3rd for orders over $20.00. Just use the coupon code "givethanks". Also, they are restocked and have new items that are shown on the front page. Happy shopping!

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12 February 2011

Baby Crown

Other than the headband style this is the first style I've attempted. From what I remember growing up in the South it's called a "crown". Babies should sleep on their backs at least until the age of nine months so you can't really do the back of their hair. Looks easy but can be quite a struggle to get baby girl to hold still long enough to get those parts straight. Especially if you're a beginner like me. I used a tail comb, but she is a squirmer. I use Proclaim rubber bands because they won't damage hair. Got them at Sally's. Something I found that looks better is if you put the last wrap of the rubber band around the bottom instead of the top. I keep her hair moisturized with 100% pure coconut oil that I get from Nutiva. It makes the hair coming out the rubber bands go right into a curl. Her hair is actually about three inches long, but curls up because it's so moisturized. I promise to get close up pics on future dos. There aren't really any instructions on how to do this. I used hair combs to hold back the hair I was not rubber banding. Make sure you comb the hair before you rubber band it. Otherwise the curls will show in the base of the piggytail and it'll look messy.

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